“I find myself to lose again
I feel certainly unsure of myself
I know my path but i walk directionless
flowing with the wind, fixedly aimless.
I follow no religion
I pray to the heavens though
I may seem cynical but i do believe
in the traces of humanity, present in you and me
I feel confident when i face the world
I have moments of self doubt left alone
I know my limits but i aim for the sky
its a world of opportunities for me to explore and try.
I flounder, make mistakes
i try to change, mostly i don’t
I’am stubborn but i do apologize
for my errors, i’am by no means wise.
I frequently fall in love
I trust only a few
I’am emotionally fragile but i’am strong
protecting my love,not accepting any wrong.
I’am free in my thoughts
I’am bound by my actions
I’am an intricate puzzle but easy to solve
the pieces are ever-changing, i constantly evolve.
I’am finishing only to begin again
I’am entering a new phase of life
I carry old memories only to create more
its just one life i have, cherish it, i will for sure.”
I had written this poem back in class twelfth, just before our farewell from school. I find myself connecting to it again. There is something about reading your old pieces. The nostalgia envelops you, giving a sense of warmth and comfort. Bringing with it the knowledge that worrying had not helped then, nor shall it now.
My best friend Ardra is leaving town. She is going back to Odisha. I shall miss her terribly. That woman is my rock. My safe haven when i need someone to pour my feelings out to and know that i shall not be judged. Ever. We have been friends since class ninth. Like wine, our friendship has only bettered with age.
This is us. Last January. She is the one on the right. I love her.
Before i ruin my keyboard with the tears that threaten to fall i shall change the topic.
I took my dad for a drive today. He was, to say the least, surprised. The pride coursing through my veins was heady.
I have finally decided my topic for the first serious piece if writing. Now remains the task of actually writing it.
Off to eat a five star and then sleep.
P.S. : The feedback and follows are loved and appreciated. Thank you all so very much!